I’ve been woefully negligent in using this site to address themes facing women. Possibly because in the distant galaxy I come from women are people.
Even if you aren’t sexist, heterosexual female dominance can be colored by gender qualities. If only so very faintly.
Does your desire to dominate men – even if just in the bedroom – affect your feelings about the gender of your employer? If their virtues and values are equal do you can whether your boss is a man or a woman?
Originally posted 2008-12-21 10:38:04. Republished by Blog Post Promoter
Related posts:
I don’t think my desire to dominate has any effect on my perceptions of the person in charge regardless of their gender. I tremendously value good leadership wherever I find it. When it comes to real world gender issues, however, and sexism rears it’s ugly head, I find it easier to deal with sexist men than sexist women. Women female-chauvinists are blindly hateful towards their own gender in a way that makes them extraordinarily hard to deal with. It’s rare that a man hates women, even if he does have strong sexist tendencies.
I have all kinds of responses to people of different genders, but I enjoy working for both men and women. I don’t find that my desire to dominate men shows up in the workplace at all. I feel submissive towards bosses of all genders.
I find I do have a preference for female bosses, but I am certainly still able to work under men. But I do NOT feel submissive to any of my male bosses.
My current boss is a man, and while I sometimes get the sense that *he* might prefer it if I were more submissive to him, the fact that he is my BOSS means that I have to defer to him when he makes a decision. Yes, there have been times when I felt he was making the wrong decision, but if he makes the decision despite my arguments, then I let it go (even if I’m covertly gritting my teeth while I do it).
The major difference that I see in the workplace between myself and women who are not dominant is that I am much more willing to make my arguments to my superiors in the first place. I used to be like my female coworkers–the “don’t rock the boat/suffer in silence” type. Now I am the only woman in my workplace who will tell it like it is to our male boss. (And I don’t mean whining or bitching; it’s more of a putting-all-my-cards-on-the-table straightforwardness when there’s a problem.) I suspect it means that I’m happier at work than I’d otherwise be, because it means that my concerns get addressed… albeit not always in the way that I’d like best.
Sadiste, do you want to work for me?
.
It takes “balls” to stand up to your boss. As long as it is done with respect, a good boss will appreciate it. You don’t have to grit your teeth when you say “Yes, sir.” or “Yes, ma’am.” — Unless you are profit sharing.
Back to topic. Most of my bosses were male. I’ve not noticed a dominant streak in any of them towards the opposite gender although some were more paranoid control freaks than others.
Mrs. Mule had almost exclusively female bosses. She hasn’t noticed dominance in any of them either towards their male subordinates. However, she finds that female bosses can be more “catty” and “petty” than male bosses. There was a lot more “high school” antics particularly if there are a number of female bosses that from a clique.
I’ve been able to resolve the issue of being a boss and a submissive. I’ve had some very dynamic women working for me. My preferred leadership style is based on “wind them up and watch them go.”
By “wind them up” I mean giving them the tools, training, equipment and guidance to get the job done, and then stand back and watch them do it. This means I have to do a lot of things FOR my subordinates and TRUST them to do them. These are two traits a good sub has.
I tend to subordinate myself in many ways to my subordinates. I like the variety women bring to the job. They think differently than men do. Figuring out what motivates people and working that into the job is the fun part of management.
I have worked for men, I have worked for women. In both genders I have encountered good bosses and bad ones. Both my best and worst boss ever were male.
Currently boss is female and certainly not the worst boss I have had. I don’t really care on the gender. As long as he/she is fair and lets me do my job.
Work is asexual & sometimes testoterene driven Bosses may fall into Bill-Monica Oval Office traps —-if you leave your sexuality outside the office & focus only on success regardless of gender you will have spectacular success in the workplace —that means irrespective of a male or female boss YOU will get ahead in Career Sweepstakes !